Yes, I was angry
I couldn't fully explain
Do you know what made me angry?
To see you living a life you don't deserve
To see how much you work
How many bad things you surround with
You are my pure angel
You are my definition of truth
And at the same time it came to my hear
I Remembered how lonely I feel
Remembered how I miss your eyes in the morning
Remembered how great your mere presence makes me feel amazing
Remembered that I now live in a place that I don't want
Remembered that the voices I hear in my house are not the one I want
And if we were just closer... together....
If we just had kept our hands closer....
If we had just lived a life together....
Everything would've been different
We would actually be happy, fullfilled,living true lives
It just made me angry to realize all of that,
You were always my propeller
And the more distant you were, the weaker I got
And now I'm just in ruins
I have literally nothing
It's in my mind. always
Everyday
Every minute and second
Since I met you
I wanted us to not be apart any longer
Yes
I wanted to see you everyday
Cook breakfast for you
I'd make you english cake every morning
I wanted us to be away from this city
From all this dirt, corruption, insanity
I didn't want to be the person you see once a week
I wanted to be your loved one
Your husband
I wanted you, our dogs and children to be the reason I wake up
And I would, everyday
And I would work unlike anyone you'd ever met
Even If I'd lost everything
I'd build all very quickly
I've done that already
I'd make us a factory of ninho candies
Build with you the best kernel of the country
And If all failed
I'd still be the best software person I am
Because I'd have done anything to build a future with you
To give you what you want
I just needed you
I don't need luxury, utopias, or anything
I only needed you close to me
I'd live in a small room with you
And from there build us a castle
That is all we always needed to get what we wanted
This is the reality
Together
We were always stronger
And I don't know about you
But apart
I always just fell apart
I know you made your mind
But I want to show you what I always wanted
I want to explain my anger, why i inconformed
It's because none of it would happen if we were together
If you'd believed in me
If you'd given me a chance
My greatest dream and utopia
Was to hear from you a good morning
Every single day
And from that
I'd have all the blessing I needed
Everything else in my life
All the troubles and mishappenings
Would be a small
Irrelevant detail
If you had just really yes, took my hands and joined me
If you had just said "Let's get ourt of here right now"
Even If you had let me stayed with in in your tiny house
Even if you stayed with me in my tiny place downtown
We could've been in a humble place, but we would be free
From there, I know we would go far
So far from here, we would find our place
And that's why God connected our lives
Because our beliefs, ideas and destiny is the same
There would be no disease to kill us
There would no barrier we couldn't cross
Our love was the greatest remedy, truth and meaning I ever got
And now I have nothing
Now I just wait for the doors of timelessness.
18/11/2018, 3:18pm